All Cantabridgian Rejects

I quote:

I am very sorry to inform you that we are unable to offer you a place at Trinity or to recommend you for further consideration in the inter-College Pool. I am sorry to have to give you this disappointing news.

-Admissions Secretary

Midway through, especially after the interview, I started wondering what I was thinking when I applied. I somehow knew that it would be difficult if not impossible. But for some stupid reason, I still hoped that I could squeeze through the gates.

And so it came to pass that I was [REJECTED]

The sensation is odd. It's like a weight was lifted off me while some subterranean beast materialised deep down, gnawing. I feel like crying but I don't want to. I should feel sad but there's no sadness. In fact, I'm grinning. o.O I ate chocolate but it had no effect (probably not the right type). I've lost my cheesecake craving though.

I'm not really good enough for Cambridge, am I? Well, I've always thought that and that's what made me miss last years application round. But it's utterly true isn't it?

I still know that I love studying science even though the rejection amounts to them telling me I'm not enthusiastic enough. Maybe I could rationalise the conflict. Maybe I can't. Maybe I'll just ignore it.

Perhaps I should see this as serendipity. Perhaps my path lies elsewhere? Perhaps I will be happier in Melbourne?

There are pros, certainly. I could settle down, find romance, start studying in earnest and not worry about costs.

Now all my hopes rest on unimelb. I know that if they reject me, my crying will be inevitable.

I guess the most productive thing for me to do is to follow the original plan. And prepare the backup plan (get rejected by unimelb and jump off a bridge).

This year, my revised academic aims are to:
1. achieve straight distinctions.
2. achieve FULL MARKS in at least one subject.
3. get on Dean's List.
By hook or by crook.

Time to pack...

PS I need chocolate, cake, ice-cream, coffee and roti bawang.

When the dog bites,
when the bee stings,
when I'm feeling sad,
I simply remember my favorite things,
and then I don't feel so bad.
-Sound of Music